Monday, September 12, 2011
Author Interview: Dan Elish
You make the front page! What does the headline say?
My dream headline: One Billionth Copy of The School for the Insanely Gifted Sold
My second dream headline: Dan Elish Negotiates World Peace
My nightmare headline: Dan Elish to be Test Subject in Effects of Continuous Month Long Asparagus Consumption
You and Daphna spend a day together. What do you do?
First, I would drop by Daphna’s studio on the Upper West Side of New York. Daphna would press the “music room” button on her control panel and the stove and fridge would magically disappear and the piano would slide out. Then Daphna would play me her latest composition. After that, I believe that her friend Harkin – otherwise known as “the Thunk” - would drop over. Actually, he’d fly by in his Thunkmobile. Daphna and I would climb aboard and take a quick spin to Paris for a croissant, then head back to Vermont to check out the foliage. After lunch, we’d stop in at the Ben & Jerry’s factory where we’d sample their new flavor, The Insanity Cup, coffee and mint chip ice creams, blended with Oreo cookies and more chocolate chips (this is my dream flavor). After that, we’d fly back to New York and see Cynthia Trustwell in a Broadway musical. At the curtain call, I would jump onto the stage to do my famous belly dance while simultaneously reciting the opening chapter of Harry Potter in Polish. Afterwards, Daphna, the Thunk, Cynthia and I would meet the mayor for dinner at Gracie Mansion. Then we’d go to Central Park (with the mayor) and spend the night in a tree fort.
Which Death Eater, besides Voldemort, would you want to fight?
I know he isn’t from Harry Potter, but I’d really like to fight Darth Vadar. My kids love Star Wars and each own a light saber. As a result, I like to believe that I’ve become quite expert in the jedi war arts. I think I could take Darth Vadar down.
Probably Hades, God of the Underworld. Aside from being the ruler of the underworld, he had a three headed dog and a screech owl. I like dogs, but with one head a piece. I also like owls, but only when they are quiet.
What kind of dinosaur would you describe yourself as?
The Brachylophosarus because his unusual head crest cause scientists to call him “the Elvis of Dinosaurs.” I don’t look a thing like Elvis Presley, but I do love music. I like to think that Brachylophosarus would have enjoyed listening to old Beatles’ records with me. I also like to think that he would happily serve as a bodyguard to my children when they get old enough to stay out late at parties. Finally, the Brachylophosarus ate only plants, which means that I would never have to be in fear of its eating me.
Thank you, Dan, for those awesome answers!
Make sure you guys all check out The School for the Insanely Gifted, already out. You can even read the first chapter here, so get on that!
Posted by Kari Olson at 8:12 AM